A Real Look at the Financial Costs of Adoption

what it actually costs (including my exact numbers!)

Before starting in on this mini series on adoption I polled my Instagram audience and by far the most asked question was, "How much does it cost?”

I get it. The financial aspect can be overwhelming, especially when you're already emotionally invested in growing your family. And just like a fertility journey, there are no guarantees in adoption.

I’m splitting this article up into 2 sections. First, an overview of adoption costs and research into the “average” costs. For the second part, I will share my actual costs from my experience with three different adoptions (spoiler alert- these were higher than the numbers I found in my research, often not even within the “ranges” provided).

I share this not to deter anyone from adoption but to share openly what we experienced and to hopefully help some of you out there have a realistic picture and be able to appropriately plan.

After three adoptions, I've learned that understanding the real costs upfront helps you prepare and make informed decisions.

The Costs

Current research shows domestic infant adoption costs $30,000-$60,000, with the average around $41,000. Foster care adoption is different, typically free or under $2,800. While my experience has been higher costs than these averages, my consultants have always provided specific cost estimates upfront, and our adoptions stayed within those ranges provided.

What You're Actually Paying For

• Homestudy Costs: Multiple fees (broken down below)

• Agency Fees: Represents birth mother, provides services

• Consultant Fees: Represents adoptive parents (optional)

• Profile Books: photography & design for “profile books”

• Legal Fees: Attorney fees

• Birth Mother Expenses: Medical, living expenses, counseling (varies by state)

• Travel Costs: If matched out of state (last minute flights + accommodation for staying out of state for ~ 2 weeks)

• Court/Finalization Fees

Other “Costs”

While not the focus of this article, I thought it worth mentioning two other investments required in pursuing adoption-

• Time Investment- this is significant! I treat the paperwork necessary for an adoption as a part-time job and have a Trello board to help me track all the moving parts.

• Emotional Investment- reviewing cases, potential for broken matches, etc

To help demonstrate the investment I thought it might be helpful to share some of the upfront paperwork required to complete the Homestudy (this must be completed before reviewing cases or matching with a birth mom).

Homestudy Requirements:

• Application fee

• Home study evaluation fee (in-person visit(s) both pre & post placement)

• Multiple background checks & fingerprinting

• Medical exams, including TB testing and drug testing

• Updated vet records for pets

• Required training courses (varies) + CPR training

• Document fees (birth certificates, marriage certificate, etc.)

• Annual updates (if adoption takes longer than a year)

The specific agency or consultants you work with will have a myriad of other documents and paperwork requirements in addition to the above.

The Truth

Yes, adoption is expensive. But so is having biological children when you factor in medical costs, lost wages, and years of potential fertility struggles and/or treatments.

The difference is that adoption costs are upfront and visible, while other family-building costs may be more spread out and some covered by insurance.

My Perspective

After three adoptions, I've learned that the financial investment is significant but manageable with planning.

While the costs add up, I always come back to the fact that adoption gives you a baby. Whenever I find myself getting frustrated with another fee or tedious process, I remind myself what is at stake. I wouldn’t want the process to be without effort and multiple checks and references.

My advice? Don't let the cost be the deciding factor. If you feel called to adoption, there are ways to make it work financially.

---

For Paid Subscribers: My Actual Numbers